The 3 Step Formula to Get a “Yes” When it Matters Most

Caveat: This method works best with someone who you’re close to and who you already spend a lot of time with. This article won’t help you butter up your boss for a raise.

You’re going to:

1. Offer tons of value in the weeks leading up to the big day. That way, when it comes time to ask, she (or he) will already feel karmically indebted to you.
2. Make the proposal after she has already exercised for the day (preferably after a hard workout).
3. Pop the question right after she takes the first bites of her post-workout meal.

If this sounds random, trust me, it will all make sense soon. After all, it’s science (the science of reciprocity to be exact).

Step 1: lays the psychological groundwork for a positive response.

Step 2: primes her brain for clear thinking and emotional calm with physical activity.

Step 3: times the question for when she’s most likely to give you a yes.

Step 1: Offer Value. Be Positive. Be Memorable.

Let’s face it; we’re suckers for good energy. Happiness is a commodity few people can say “no” to. In the weeks leading up to popping the question, get on her good side. The trick here is to be subtle, and you’re going to do that by blasting her with positive “passive” energy. What do I mean by “passive”? Be a joy to be around! The good energy she picks up from you just by being your happy self will sneakily win points for you.

Over the course of the next few weeks, sprinkle in some direct favors. Go out of your way to help her here and there, but don’t overdo it. Too many favors and she might get the impression that you’re sucking up to her. That’s what you don’t want to do, and that’s the reason why it’s important to make her feel good without it looking like you’re trying to.

“Love is a positive, symbiotic, reciprocal flow between two or more entities.” – Inga Muscio

There are two factors are at work here:

1. You’re establishing a positive association between you and her, good things are happening, and good feelings being felt.
2. You’re also engaging the principle of reciprocity.

In social psychology, reciprocity refers to the compulsion we all have to keep tabs on favors. Apparently, it drives us nuts when this gets out of balance. Reciprocity also addresses the expectation of treating others as they treat you.

Psychologist Robert Cialdini discusses the principle of reciprocity is in his classic book, Influence, The Psychology of Persuasion. In it, Cialdini explains that reciprocity is a cultural expectation that’s deeply ingrained into the fabric of who we are.

By the time you’re done buttering her up, the favors will be lopsided in your favor, and she’ll be more likely to say yes to your proposal.

Step 2: Make the Proposal When Her Brain is Stress-Free

Exercise is proven to reduce stress and anxiety, improve short-term memory, and stabilize your mood. These benefits are primarily due to the reduction of the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol. Exercise also releases feel-good endorphins and encourages the expression of BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factor) in the brain. BDNF is a protein that’s critical for memory and learning.

That’s why you’re going to wait to ask the big question until she has already gotten her workout in for the day. “But what if she doesn’t work out very often?” you say. If that’s the case, going for a walk will have to do. A nice stroll is still better than nothing, and the positive health effects of walking on the brain are also well-documented. According to research, when you walk, the foot’s impact helps control and increase the amount of blood that’s sent to the brain.

At this point, you’ve gotten on her good side, her brain is feeling phenomenal, and now it’s time to put the icing on the cake and go for it.

Step 3: Pop the Question While She’s Enjoying a Delicious Meal

What’s the icing on the cake? Cake! Or at least it could be. Ideally, though, she’ll be hungry enough for a full meal. You don’t want her to be famished, but definitely a solid 7 out of 10 on the hunger scale. She’s more likely to say yes when she’s absorbed in the ecstasy of the food she’s been craving. Full people say, “yes.” Hungry people say, “no.”

Psychology Today wrote an interesting article about the fluctuation of parole approvals issued by judges over the course of their shift. Apparently, hungry judges make tougher sentences. As lunch approaches (and the judge gets hungrier), he approves fewer and fewer inmates for parole. After lunch, however, the judge accepts significantly more parole applications. By the end of his shift, the parole rates once again plummet. This guy is keeping people in prison based off of how hungry he is!

We’ve all experienced that warm feeling of relaxation wash over the table when the food is finally served. It’s this feeling that you’re going to capitalize on. When she’s a few bites into her dish, that’s your cue. Don’t be nervous! Success is in your favor. If you’ve done your due diligence over the course of the last few weeks, now is as good a time as ever to let the dice roll.

“Food is not rational. Food is culture, habit, craving and identity.” – Jonathan Safran Foer

Conclusion

Are you asking your wife if you can dig up the lawn and put a dirt bike course in the backyard? Hoping that your roommates will let you get a dog? Whatever it is, I wish you the best of luck. Make sure to feel their energy out as you go. Life isn’t as predictable as a 3-step formula, so if it feels like a bad time to pop the question, it probably is. Trust your gut and only pull the trigger if the positive vibes are going strong. Make sure that there’s a smile on their face, give them a smile right back, and get that ‘YES’!

How will you be using this three step formula to get a “yes” in your life? Let us know in the comments below!

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https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/the-3-step-formula-to-get-a-yes-when-it-matters-most/

The 12 Killer Lessons I Learned In 2017 That You Can Implement Right Now.

Every year I reflect on the lessons I’ve learned so that I can remember what I achieved and inspire others to reach their own dreams and goals.

I’m all about actionable advice and these lessons can be understood and implemented right away. Giving up on excuses and moving into action is the only way I’ve seen to do the cool things that everyone else wishes they could do but haven’t realized are within their reach.

These are the killer lessons I’ve learned in 2017:

 

I can conquer fear and so can you.

2017 has been a year of conquering fears. I did the uncomfortable things that I previously always put off and this allowed me to break through fear. The secret was to schedule those difficult activities and not care about the outcome.

Those fearful activities included: public speaking, sharing vulnerable thoughts on social media, going on dates with girls I’d never met and acknowledging my weaknesses. All of it was very challenging but when I look back, that’s where the growth has come from in 2017.

You can crush your fears too. Give it a go and disconnect your mind from what might happen.

 

I can overcome addictions and so can you.

In previous years gone by, I ignored my addictions. I pretended they didn’t exist and that I was a Cookie Cutter Citizen – I defiantly wasn’t. 2017 made me discover who I wanted to be and give up those addictions to make room for what I wanted in my life.

No longer did I lie to myself. While the addictions felt amazing, overcoming them felt ten times better. The key to beating these addictions was getting help from someone other than myself and holding myself to a higher standard.

I also became compassionate with myself when I fell back into old ways and allowed myself a few slip-ups.

You can look your addictions in the eye too and decide enough is enough. Try it.

 

I can be focused and so can you.

I’m typically all over the shop. 2017 brought a real focus on minimalism and I used this life hack in every aspect of my day-to-day living. At the end of it all, the new focus I created gave me:

– More time
– Fewer material belongings
– Higher quality relationships with my family, friends and colleagues
– More money
– Outstanding results in blogging

Focus is not about being more productive; it’s about doing less.

“Subtract all the noise and what you’ll be left with is a phenomenal sense of focus that you can use to achieve your big goals”

If my noisy, disorganized mind can become focused then so can yours. Try subtracting.

 

I can give to people that have nothing and so can you.

One of the highlights of 2017 was spending Christmas Day with the homeless and giving everything I had at that point in time to people who needed it the most. I gave my time, money, inspiring ideas and network to anyone I encountered on Christmas Day.

This very special day taught me that I have enough and that fulfillment is found in places you may not have looked yet.

“Putting a few dollars towards presents for the needy is nowhere near as good as being with them and giving them the human connection that they really seek (not the money)”

You too can spend a festive day with people who have nothing. Sign up in advance so you don’t forget or come up with excuses.

 

I can be kind and so can you.

2017 has been about thinking before taking action. Instead of defaulting to angry behavior I chose to think first and react later. This hack has allowed me to be kinder to everybody. If a car cuts me off in traffic, I now consider the consequences of shooting my mouth off and trying to seek justice.

If someone close to me says something I don’t like, I try not to sound superior and allow them to have their own point of view. We can all be kind when we stop and think first.

We need more kindness in the world and it starts with you. Try being kind and see how good it feels.

 

I can do major, unplanned travel and so can you.

Wow, Japan was fun in 2017! I went there with only two days to plan and got on a last-minute flight. Normally I’d insist on having months to plan and trying to predict every step. This time, I embraced the fear and just went to Japan without any plans.

“Uncertainty and lack of planning leads to freedom and unexpected exploration”

Some of the best experiences are ones where you don’t know what to expect (especially when you don’t speak the language of the place you’re going.)

If I can book a trip with two day’s notice then so can you. Try going overseas last minute and getting away from your habits and normality. It will allow you to return with a new perspective.

 

I can do public speaking without preparation and so can you.

My public speaking skills have improved in 2017 but never did I think I could speak without preparation. 2017 proved this idea to be false. Many of you suffer from a fear of public speaking and one of the best things you can do is to practice without any notes or idea of what you’re going to say.

Preparation can often lead to over planning which carries a whole new type of fear. If I can go from being scared of public speaking to placing in the finals in several public speaking competitions, then so can you.

Try doing public speaking without preparing, on a topic you know well.

 

I can invest well and so can you.

Money has always been something I wanted to master so I can focus my time on other things like blogging. 2017 was the year I finally started investing not just in myself and my development, but in investments that have a financial return.

I used the Warren Buffett strategy for stocks and using index funds, as well as dabbling in higher risk investments like cryptocurrency.

Both strategies proved to be winners. The biggest thing I did though was spent less and automatically deduct money from my income, and place it into investments. You can start from any financial position and invest any amount of money.

The key I’ve found is to make investing a habit and automate it. You also need a balance of risk and to have a bit of high risk in your portfolio.

If I can invest well with no finance degree then so can you. If you don’t know where to start, read “The Barefoot Investor” (that’s what I did).

 

I can be better with my time and so can you.

Less coffee catch ups and more time with like-minded people were certainly wise decisions in 2017. I stopped trying to please everyone and said no more often. I delivered each no with respect, positivity and humbleness.

I invested my time in activities like blogging, reading and relaxing. This gave me more of what I wanted and less of other people’s priorities. Trying to make everyone else happy is a loser strategy that will make you busy and feel like rubbish. Choose yourself first when it comes to time.

If I can find more hours in the day and do what I love then so can you. It all starts with saying no more often and knowing what you value. Invest your time like you would your hard-earned money.

 

I can start a business and so can you.

For around five years I’ve put off starting another business. 2017 was the year I created my social media consulting agency and begun my coaching business. Both these business ventures allow me to help others and get paid to do what I love.

For years I talked about starting another business after my previous ventures but I always thought I wasn’t good enough and didn’t have enough value to deliver. I was wrong.

You are probably wrong too about why you can’t start a business tomorrow. Try it. Start asking for money from people who could use your expertise.

 

I can fall in love and so can you.

Smashed my goal this year of finding a proper girlfriend. It wasn’t fate; it was intentional and hard work. There’s someone out there for all of us including you. Be bold and begin the search if you haven’t already done so.

 

I can eat healthy and look after myself and so can you.

Earlier in 2017, I made the decision to have a few casual wines again. Things got way out of control and I fell back into my old ways. Thankfully, after a couple of drunken months, I quit again and am now back to where I want to be. I can have one wine and be all good.

Food was another area that I let get out of control. I had an ice cream or two and that led to a mild sugar addiction. This sucked my energy away and made me feel tired. I also discovered through lots of experimentation that I wasn’t sleeping enough.

I now insist on a minimum of eight hours sleep despite what the “Hustle Till Your Dead” picture quotes say. This has given me a newfound energy and allowed me to outperform in the area of my passions. We have to look after ourselves otherwise we can’t enjoy life to its fullest.

If I can be disciplined and look after my body then so can you. Treat your body well and life will be even more incredible.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

from
https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/the-12-killer-lessons-i-learned-in-2017-that-you-can-implement-right-now/

3 Questions to Ask Yourself for a Winning Business

“My pleasure”. We’ve all heard this before right? It is probably not implemented more than in the culture at Chik-Fil-A. I can’t tell you how many times I go in there and like clockwork they respond to every request with my pleasure. This is something that, not only separates them from their competition but continues to make them a destination for people to seek out when they are hungry.

This attitude that every employee from the cook to the owner carries is something that we should all learn from and understand the importance of in our daily interactions with people, prospects, and customers.  

Are you conditioning yourself everyday to be in a position of service for your family, friends, clients, and anyone that you come into contact with? Too many times I see people not focused and aware of the potential opportunities walking around them every day. Do you want to know why they are missing them? It is because their attitude sucks and isn’t one ready to be of service.   

1. Are You Approachable?   

Are you presenting yourself to everyone with a smile? This is a simple tactic you can implement right now that will open up more conversation opportunities for you and will have others asking how your day is going and the most common question or response from others will be, what has you smiling today?  Nature guards humans and to break down the barriers they have up, you have to be someone they feel is there to help them or be of service. Smiling first is key to opening them up and start breaking down their defenses.  

“To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity” – Douglas Adams

2. Are You A Good Listener?

After you create the introduction and start the dialogue with your customer or prospect it is essential to be quiet and listen to them.They will begin to tell you what, how, and why they are looking for help and give you the opportunity to show them how your service will solve their problems and needs. Too many times I see salespeople or business individuals talk right through their prospect or customer and in essence, talk themselves right out of a sale.  

Listening is crucial to being in the customer service business. I mean how you can indeed solve a problem for someone if you first refuse to listen to them and find out their problem/problems in the first place?  

“Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth” – Muhammad Ali

3. Are You An Action Taker?  

The best of the best take action to service their customers, clients, or others for that matter. Talking points are great but it’s the activity and the action steps that people are looking for and out of you. If you really want to create an environment of service, this is non-negotiable. Don’t just communicate with your prospects how you are going to help them or service them, SHOW them through your commitments, actions, and abilities to solve their problems. This is a major part of the attitude of service framework that is necessary to separate you from the all the rest.   

You must first create an environment of service in your own daily habits everyday to create the atmosphere of service you want your colleagues, clients, and general surroundings to see from you as well. Your attitude is the first thing you have to check to get this mindset in alignment with your habits.  

Create a daily smile that others find welcoming.  Listen to everything going on around you so that you are sharp and aware of your surroundings, and then attack every day with actions of solving problems and elevating yourself as the solution others seek out when they need a product or service to better their situation and business.

What are some things you do that show your attitude of service? Comment Below!

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https://addicted2success.com/startups/3-questions-to-ask-yourself-for-a-winning-business/

Why My Christmas Day This Year Tops Them All And How You Can Replicate It For Next Year.

Its taken two years, and this Christmas I finally got to spend it with 300 homeless / disadvantaged / victims of domestic violence. A lot of them have had the toughest year of their life and I have been determined to make a difference.

My opportunity to help came and I took it. I know what it’s like to go through really hard times and I feel that this has given me the tools to help others. So, no more excuses, this Christmas has become everything I dreamed it could be.

After a bit of planning, what followed was the best Christmas Day I have ever had. I changed what Christmas meant to me and I want to share that gift with all of you. I want you to have the best Christmas Day ever, as well as learn some valuable lessons that will change your perspective.

Here’s why this year’s Christmas Day was the best ever and this is how you can replicate it:

 

Show that strangers care.

At the Christmas lunch I volunteered at to serve those in need, I heard a story of a little boy whose mum was the victim of domestic violence. She has nothing and her boy doesn’t have much of a Christmas. His one wish was to be able to go to soccer practice with a pair of boots and a ball.

I decided to buy him both these presents to show him that strangers care. It’s not about the gift that I gave him – what I wanted him to see was that strangers care. This gift gives him the ability to have hope that his family’s situation can change.

During the Christmas lunch, one of the volunteers tipped off this little boy’s mother and told her that I had bought the gifts for her son. Unexpectedly, she came over and hugged me. She was very emotional and thanked me for helping.

I didn’t want thanks and I told her so politely. I told her one thing:

“What I’ve done is show you that strangers care. You don’t need to thank me. What you must do when you are able to, is pay it forward.”

I wanted her to understand that giving is about sharing the message and doing the same for others who need help. This one lesson was the highlight of my Christmas Day.

Replicating my Christmas Day requires you not to give blindly to a charity, but to get out there and show your face and help people. The best gifts you can give are your time, your advice, your kindness and your faith in humanity.

 

Make Christmas Day about somebody other than you.

Without a doubt, my Christmas Day was the best ever because I made it about someone other than myself. Every other year has been about what I want and what will make me happy. The decisions I have made on previous Christmas’s have been self-centered and that’s hard to admit.

This year, I made Christmas about helping those who have nothing. It took the focus away from me and put the spotlight on somebody else and how I could make their day awesome. Seeing others happy on Christmas is what made me feel so good and words can’t describe it.

Replicating my Christmas Day starts with taking the focus off yourself.

 

Forget the word “SHOPPING.”

Don’t let any day of the year determine your spending habits or make you spend money. I did zero Christmas shopping this year and chose to buy a few things for strangers instead. Not because I needed to demonstrate that gifts matters, but because the gift I gave these people in need, was hope.

Shopping benefits business and does very little to help the average person. The only gift I got this Christmas was a handmade card, and it was so special and cost zero dollars.

Replicating my Christmas Day involves ditching the whole idea of shopping.

 

Think about the presents you’ve received in the past.

I’m willing to bet that most of the gifts you’ve received on Christmas in the past never got used or at the very least, never made you happy. Ask yourself “Do I really need another gift?”

I can guarantee you the answer is no. You don’t need gifts to have self-worth. The number of gifts or the dollar value of the gifts you get does not validate who you are. Most of us have more than what we need.

Replicating my Christmas Day involves rethinking the idea of gifts.

Image Description: Those in need receiving generous food hampers that were donated.

 

See the good in people.

Many people at the Christmas lunch I volunteered at were from questionable backgrounds. Some had been in prison and many were addicted to illegal drugs. Seeing the good in everyone on Christmas allows you to be compassionate and help others to see what’s possible.

I saw my job on Christmas as not looking down on people. I made it my job to see the best in people despite where they’ve come from.

Replicating my Christmas Day involves you seeing the potential for everyone to be good.

 

Consider what you eat on Christmas.

Is stuffing your face really required? All of us already consume far too many calories. Instead of overindulging on heaps of food while others starve, could you not try something else?

Many of the people I spent Christmas lunch with wondered why I didn’t have any food. The reason was because I wanted them to eat and to resist the temptation of falling for the idea that Christmas should be about overeating.

Replicating my Christmas Day involves giving a meal to someone who really needs it.

Image Description: Setting the table for 300 homeless / disadvantaged.

 

Forget everything you know about Christmas.

That’s what I did this year. I wanted to see if there was another way to think about this special day and I experimented with every aspect of Christmas to challenge the status quo. The end result showed me that what I thought Christmas was, was in fact completely wrong.

I’d been programmed to follow what everyone else did without knowing why. I changed that why and I recommend you do the same. Christmas can be magical if you turn the whole idea on its head and question everything you thought you knew prior.

It’s time to live the real meaning of Christmas. I want all of you to experiment next Christmas.

Live the true meaning of Christmas. Make a difference. Inspire strangers.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/why-my-christmas-day-this-year-tops-them-all-and-how-you-can-replicate-it-for-next-year/

3 Immediate Follow-Up Ideas to Close More Sales

If you are in sales then you know the follow-up is crucial to your business and the paycheck you are wanting to earn. The crazy thing here is that most simply stink at following up or don’t even follow up at all. Then these sames individuals are the ones living payday to payday or complaining about the lack of money they are making. Seeing the disconnect yet?

There are so many ways you can follow up but I wanted to take a moment and focus on three specific ways you can immediately follow up with a prospect to ensure the closure of more sales and opportunities to present your product or service.

1. Make The “In Advance” Call Back

Setting your calendar reminders are important. Don’t get me wrong here; however, what can be a more powerful tool to ensure your prospect shows up to the meeting scheduled than by placing another call back to them 24 hours in advance? How many of you are doing that? It’s simple you know you have a call scheduled for the next day.

While you should send a calendar reminder or email reminder, you should make the call and verify with that person on that meeting. One, this is personal and shows even more commitment and conviction on your end that the meeting is important. Two, it is another way to recap, reclose, and even refresh your prospect on what the meaning of the call is all about. Be the aggressor there.

“Most people think ‘selling’ is the same as ‘talking’. But the most effective salespeople know that listening is the most important part of their job.” – Roy Bartell

2. Send A Video Message

This is key personal touch that very few do. Prospects or potential customers like to be engaged. They are used to phone calls, emails, and even mailers. However, what they aren’t used to is when they are done talking with someone who is offering them a product or service sends them a personal video message.  This message could be something simple as a “thank you” or even to confirm another meeting that was set at the initial conversation.

What will make this even more impactful as a follow up tool is the speed of implementation that you use with it. Don’t wait days after your prospect and you have spoken before sending them a video response.  Do it within minutes and set the tone early that you are someone that will follow up and set the expectation of how you want the interactions to take place moving forward. Take control and be the professional.

“Nobody likes to be sold to, but everybody likes to buy.” – Earl Taylor

3. Send The Calendar Invite In Real Time

It drives me nuts when I hear my sales staff tell a prospect that “as soon as we hang up” I will send you a calendar invite for our meeting.  Don’t do that.  Send it right then with the prospect on the phone. At the same time, instruct them to go ahead and check the ACCEPT button on the invite so both of your calendars match the date and time for the follow up call or meeting.  

This is important to start your prospect on the path of commitment. You also are taking control of the process at the time of conversation.  How many other emails or calls is your prospect getting that day?  You don’t know. What you do know is what and how your call goes while you have their attention. Keep their attention and ask for the acceptance while you know they are looking at their emails. Don’t just trust the process you are working in, verify it.

What are some follow up tips you do in your business? Comment below!

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https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/3-immediate-follow-up-ideas-to-close-more-sales/

5 Simple Strategies for When You’ve Made a Business Mistake

Anyone in business with years of experience will likely be able to cite a variety of past mistakes, whether they involve missing a meeting, not delivering content by a deadline or upsetting a client. The reality is, it’s impossible to be error-free in the demanding world of business, where deadlines and individual client preferences are numerous.

Ideally, businesses have a structure in place that helps prevent mistakes before they occur, even though they may still happen. As a result, businesses should realize that a mistake shouldn’t be a deal-breaker. A mistake can present an opportunity to solidify a client relationship, by giving you a chance to make up for it and more.

Here are five simple strategies to address mistakes in business, with integrity and honesty:

1. Provide Clients With Transparency

Businesses that make a mistake and refuse to tell a client about it until questioned will find themselves at the receiving end of an understandably irate client. Giving clients a heads-up shows integrity and a steadfast commitment to making it right, especially if they are not yet aware of the issue.

Ideally, you can address the issue with the client in person, or at least by phone. Showing an apologetic tone in an email is difficult. When apologizing, don’t beat around the bush. Directly clarify the mistake, why it happened and the resolution in progress. By telling a customer or client about a mistake before they realize it on their own, you enforce a willingness to take responsibility and right wrongs.

2. Offer Reassurance on Resolving the Issue

Being transparent about a business mistake is just the first step. It’s equally important to clarify with a client how you will resolve the issue. Since the last thing anyone wants is for the partnership to dissolve with a refund or termination of a contract, the best route is to offer a clear plan on how the project’s results will improve. You should also clarify what steps have been implemented to ensure the mistake does not occur again.

For example, if a PR agency sends out a press release for a client with erroneous content, it can immediately notify the client of the issue, while ensuring them that this round of pitching and its corrective follow-up round will be free of charge. This shows a business taking responsibility for its mistakes, while also offering a solid plan as to how it can resolve the issue without taking more resources or money from the client.

“A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity.” – Dalai Lama

3. Ask for Their Resolution Idea

After providing your own reassurance and strategy to amend the mistake, you should ask the client if there’s anything else you can do. If you proposed a firm plan for correcting the issue, then it’s likely they will simply say no — though the question provides room to make things right if they are not satisfied with your proposal.

If you intend on providing a discount due to your mistake, it’s better to ask the customer for their idea of a resolution before offering a discount, as their ideal discount may be less than what you initially intended on proposing. By accepting their idea for a resolution, the business is essentially admitting all wrongdoing while increasing the confidence of the client.

Additionally, for whatever the customer proposes as a solution, it’s a good idea to increase their desire slightly. For example, if a customer feels that a 10 percent discount is fair, counter with something like, “10 percent is very fair, and I’m very apologetic for our mistake. As a result, I will provide you with 15 percent off as a thank you for your understanding.”

4. Value the Power of Word-of-Mouth

Most clients are knowledgeable enough to know that mistakes happen. Their evaluation of a business incorporates how it responds to its errors. Especially in the digital age, reviews of a business are prevalent on social media and various review platforms.

A business that goes above and beyond to amend its mistake, by informing the customer of its error and offering a fair compensation, is likelier to be praised in reviews as taking charge of mistakes. Combined with other reviews from clients who ideally did not experience mistakes, a business will have an excellent review presence online.

“Free publicity and word of mouth is probably the best and cheapest form of advertising. Learn to use it to your advantage.” – Richard Branson

5. Don’t Stress That It Wasn’t Purposeful

If a client or consumer has spent time and money on your services, then they likely already know your mistake was just that, not some intentional sabotage. As a result, continually stressing that your mistake wasn’t on purpose is a waste of time, especially when you can be spending the dialogue on ideas for resolution and compensation. Taking the lead on amending a mistake is significantly more important than declaring its intent or lack thereof.

Mistakes happen in business, quite often. Eliminating these mistakes is ideal, but when they do occur, it’s possible for a business to salvage a client relationship with transparency, reassurance and a viable resolution.

How do you recover from a business mistake? Comment below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

from
https://addicted2success.com/startups/5-simple-strategies-for-when-youve-made-a-business-mistake/

5 Ways to Become a Remarkable Person and Always Get What You Want in Life

When my dad was alive, he would give my elder sister dozens of gifts, like ten times a day! He gave her chocolates, ice cream, snacks, ribbons, perfumes, you name it. He said, “she’s the top student in her class; she helps her mom with house chores; and she comes to greet me every day.”

Nabila still enjoys gifts from her employer, friends, and community, because her kind spirit and intelligence still shine through today. She’s just a remarkable young lady. Very remarkable.

Do you want to become a remarkable person and always get what you want in life? Then follow these tips:

1. Identify your weaknesses

You’re not perfect. No one is. Maybe you struggle with procrastination, maybe you have a hard time waking up early, or maybe you suck at time management. In one way or another, you have some shortcomings as a human, and that’s fine.

What is not fine is failing to recognize and identify them. Smart, remarkable people know who they are because they understand their strengths and their weaknesses. They know in order to become exceptional, they need to be true to themselves and do the things that make them uncomfortable. So, they struggle daily to replace their bad habits with good ones.

2. Wage a war on yourself

When you identify your weaknesses, you might find a number of problems in your life. They can be anything from laziness to waking up late to extravagant spending to gambling. However, can you face these problems on the battlefield? If you want to become a better you, you have to change your life.

In order to change your life you must revolt against your old habits—break the bad ones, and instill the good ones—with consistent practice, discipline, and commitment.

For example, when Eleanor Roosevelt became First Lady of the United States in 1933, she was scared to speak publicly at first. However, realizing that there was no other way, she learned to do it, challenging us to fight our insecurities and “do the things we can’t do.”

“The only proper way to eliminate bad habits is to replace them with good ones.” – Jerome Hines

3. Position yourself on the foundation of honesty

People won’t just wake up one day and start respecting you, seeing you as a unique person, and responding to your queries with excitement and regard. You’ll have to earn their trust first. You’ll have to portray yourself as a person of integrity. You’ll have to respect them, do good to them, and help them succeed.

To achieve all of that, you have to be willing to make sacrifices because, as my friend once told me, “life is like a business. Your personality is your brand, and you need to make a good impression out of it, just like a manager hands over a professional, impressive business card at a business meeting.”

When you give a good first impression and reveal your integrity and honesty over time, you don’t even have to inquire about anything. People will grant your request without your even asking. Why? Because you’ve already earned their trust.

4. Do the things that scare you

You want to start a business, win that job, or beat that bulging belly once and for all, but you simply don’t have the energy to do it. You try, yes, starting and working at it for days or weeks. Then your motivation shrinks. You lack the courage and confidence to pursue your goals, because you’re scared.

“Starting a business is risky,” a voice may echo deep inside your mind. “What if I fail?” “That digital marketing position is damn competitive,” another voice shouts from within. “I won’t waste my time applying. I’m not good enough.”

On the surface, these excuses might seem logical, but in reality, they are mere hallucinations; tales narrated by your vulnerable soul.

The Bezos and the Beckhams hear these words just like anyone else. However, they brush them away as fairy tales, moving on and doing the work that matters, getting the trophies and accolades they deserve.

“Do one thing every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

5. Embrace the art of giving

One of the secrets of becoming remarkable and earning credibility is the art of giving. Giving something, whether material (like money or gifts) or immaterial (like assistance or information) has a symbolic meaning.  Giving depicts love, depicts caring and depicts friendliness.

The good news is, anyone can cultivate this simple art. You can be a student and give your all to your teachers. You can be a startup founder and give massive value to your consumers. You can be a junior employee at a small company and go all out for your employer.

When you give your all to your people, they’ll recognize you, reciprocate the gesture, and give you the special attention you deserve. Why? Because giving begets respect.

After you have followed these steps, try to request something from your friend, boss, or teacher—I don’t mean extra marks or special favors here—and see what they’ll do for you with passion, love, and excitement.

Which one of these habits do you need to work on the most and why? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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https://addicted2success.com/life/5-ways-to-become-a-remarkable-person-and-always-get-what-you-want-in-life/

Want to Take Control of Your Morning? Build Your Routine Around These 3 Pillars

Do you ever feel like you can’t get ahead during the day?  Are you tired or sluggish and can’t seem to get energized? Are you constantly putting out fires and feel overwhelmed with the situations that confront you? Until I began and stuck to a morning routine, I used to battle these feelings for most of my days.

When I reflect on the small changes I’ve made that produced the greatest results, a morning routine is #1 on the list.  It allows me to center myself before the day begins. I am able to respond instead of react to circumstances.  It gives me a sense of accomplishment before the day begins and energizes me to remain productive throughout the day.  

I built my morning routine around the 3 pillars of physical, mental, and spiritual well-being.  

1. Spiritual

I begin my day with breathwork and meditation. While I am doing this practice I ponder on a few questions.  How deep is my breath going?  What thoughts keeping popping into my head?  How do I feel compared to other days?  Am I stressed or do I feel relaxed?  Am I having trouble focusing on my breath?

Pondering on the answers to these questions allows me to center my mind and get in touch with my body.  It helps me focus throughout the day and not let stress take over.  I know I can always come back to the breath if I need to settle down.

“How am I going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I’m committed to?” – Tony Robbins

2. Mental

When I finish my breathwork and meditation, I move into a journaling practice.  I will write about my meditation and breath experience plus anything that pops into my head. I use this exercise as a brain dump to release my subconscious and anything that is on my mind.  

There is something about writing down all of the thoughts that come into your mind that is freeing. I will also use my journaling to write three things I am grateful for each day.  It does not have to be something big either.  Sometimes it is as small as the smell of my puppy’s breath.  

My goal is to think of different things every day.  This helps train the brain to look on the bright side and seek out positive experience during the day.  Lastly, I will include goals I would like to accomplish during the day and a few affirmations.

After I finish writing, I will read a passage from a book.  The reading allows me to introduce and apply beneficial information from great minds throughout history to my life.  The first information I consume on the day needs to be beneficial.  It needs to be educational and allow me to grow.  

I do not want my brain to take a look at the latest hysteria on the news or mindless social media.   From the breathwork, meditation, journaling, and reading, my mind and spirit are ready for the day.  Now I need to get the body moving.

3. Physical

My morning movement practice is not intense and is focused on opening up the joints and tight muscles with stretching and flowing movements.  I use a program called 5-Minute Flow by Max Shanks.  It consists of flowing movements similar to vinyasa flow yoga but with less structure.  It primes the pump, allowing the joints and muscles to wake up after being asleep all night.  It takes me five to ten minutes and I am ready to attack the day once this is complete.  

“If today were the last day of my life, what would I want to do? What am I about to do today?” – Steve Jobs

To Sum it Up

My morning routine takes me less than an hour and is the most beneficial time of the day for me.  It allows me to focus, brings creativity to my work, and builds on the three pillars of a whole person (mental, physical, and spiritual).  Since starting this practice over a year ago, my anxiety dropped and I have an ability to go with the flow as problems arise during the day.  

It is the structure I need to give me freedom for the rest of the day.  Starting the day knowing I have moved my body, learned something new, and delved into my inner thoughts is my first win of the day.  

If you are looking to start a morning routine, I advise trying one of these activities and see how you respond.  If you are having trouble getting movement during the day, start stretching.  If you are stressed, try breathwork and meditation.  If the thoughts in your head are getting in the way, try journaling.  The key is to start small and build.  Win the morning and you will win the day!

What does your morning routine look like? Comment Below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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https://addicted2success.com/life/want-to-take-control-of-your-morning-build-your-routine-around-these-3-pillars/

5 Success Lessons We Can All Learn From Hollywood

Hollywood is not just about producing and making movies. It is also about inspiring people and motivating them. Some videos made a significant influence on our decision making. They have writers and directors who speak to their audience. These movies have a lesson that impacts our lives mentally and emotionally.

Most people think that movies can only offer entertainment value. But for some, movies can give you lessons about leadership, success, and life. Movies stimulate our thinking and assist us in learning new things through the use of visual arts. But you need to look deeper to find that lesson.

Here are 5 lessons we can all learn from Hollywood:

1. Never give up

In the Pursuit of Happyness, it showed that if you are motivated to succeed in life, you will do anything to achieve your goals. Chris Gardner (Will Smith) struggled as his business failed. When he faced eviction and unpaid parking tickets, he did not give up. He got a job as an unpaid intern to be a broker. He took risks and reached out to high-value customers. As a result, all his efforts paid off. During his last day of internship, he was awarded a full-time position.

The movie also teaches us that being poor must not stop us from getting what we want in life. Our success is not dependent on fate or luck, but on our efforts. Because Chris has a dream, he goes after it.

Even if life humiliates you, you need to taste bitterness first before tasting happiness. After finishing his internship and selling the medical devices, Chris went to the beach and slept in a hotel. This shows that no matter what happens, you deserve a break. You also need to treat yourself and do something nice for yourself because you deserve it.

2. Create a great product

The Social Network movie is a story about the early days of Facebook. How it depicted the story of Mark Zuckerberg may not be accurate, yet it offers a great number of lessons that every entrepreneur must heed.

Mark Zuckerberg operated through a trial-and-error method by learned from the success and failure of others. The movie showed how Facebook took off successfully because of its cool factor. When Mark opposed his partner’s strategy of adding advertisements to drive revenue, it teaches us he was entirely focused on creating an excellent product that drives more users. After it had attracted millions of users, it started to implement a monetization strategy.

The movie also teaches us to take a considerable risk if you wish to be successful. Mark dropped out of Harvard to create Facebook. Although not all risk takers win, you need to risk big to win big.

“The biggest risk is not taking any risk… In a world that changing really quickly, the only strategy that is guaranteed to fail is not taking risks.” – Mark Zuckerberg

3. Surround yourself with successful people

In the X-Men movie, every member of the team has power. Due to this, they always achieve great things such as defeating the villains Magneto and Apocalypse. In life, you also need to surround yourself with successful, smart and talented individuals, because you can rely on them when your abilities and skills fall short. The movie teaches us that success can never be achieved alone. You need people to help you win big.

X-men also teaches us that leaders, too, have limitations. That’s why they need the support of their colleagues. While young leaders may be high on passion, they are usually low on life experience.  To succeed in life, you need tools. When soldiers were sent to Vietnam without the weapons, they underestimated their enemies, and Dr. Bolivar Trask admitted it.

Failure is not final. Xavier said that just because a person stumbles, it does not mean that he lost his way. It takes a leader to encourage another leader because they both have credibility. They understand the struggles that come with leadership. That’s why when Wolverine told Xavier that he has confidence in him, it means he trusts him.

4. Know what you want

The movie “The Wolf of Wall Street” offers a great number of key lessons you can learn to help you succeed such as knowing what you want in life. Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio) did not get rich by accident. He knew exactly what he wanted and how he could get there because he had a vision. He had an outcome in mind allowing him to steer his decisions.

He also learned how to sell himself by wearing fancy suits. Doing this helped people see him as successful because he ensured his suits were tailored thus people’s perception of him would change. The key here is to know what you want others to see you as and decide how you want them to see you. From there, you can present yourself in that way.

Jordan also adjusted and mastered his strategy. He specialized in penny stocks and sold cheap stocks to people. And when he pitched to ultra-wealthy, he had a strategy that worked for that market. Although at first, it was a failure, he perfected it eventually. You can also apply this to your business. You need to keep in mind your customer base and customize your pitches for your target market.

In addition to mastering his strategy, he also trained people well so that these people would implement his ideas. He taught these people to sound experienced and knowledgeable in the stock market by giving them tools. What you can learn from it is that you need to hire an excellent staff and not do all the work for yourself. You must show your staff exactly what you want them to achieve by training them well.

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.” – Jordan Belfort

5. Step out of your comfort zone

Good Will Hunting is another old movie with critical lessons about success. One of these lessons teaches us to step out of our comfort zone and take risks. It seems cliche, but life is about taking risks if you want to be successful.

Some people avoid business ventures because they do not want to risk their money. However, we need to realize everything has an outcome in the future. We are afraid to change because of fear, but as Phil Schiller said, “fear is a great motivator.” In fact, it is an undervalue motivator. Regardless of whether we fail or succeed, we learn life lessons which provide invaluable benefits for our future.

The movie also taught us that education does not always equal intelligence. Will is a self-taught genius and never had formal schooling, yet he could solve complex problems which the average man could not.

In life, you may need the education to get a job. However, you do not need to be formally educated to achieve greatness.

How are you finding consistent ways to achieve your own greatness? Please comment beow and let us know!

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https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/5-success-lessons-we-can-all-learn-from-hollywood/

7 Things You Must Do If You Want To Accomplish Anything In Life

The journey towards success is wrought with enough challenges and obstacles as it is already; anyone who has ever managed to accomplish anything great would be wise in telling you that they had to ignore countless internal and external factors to get to where they are today that would have otherwise jeopardized their efforts or been detrimental to their overall success had they chosen to direct their attention towards them.

One of the things you will discover on your own journey towards making anything happen is just how extremely easy it is to lose focus and get derailed if we take our eyes off our pursuits or give audience to negative things or people.

In order for us to make our way to the finish line as far as our goals and dreams are concerned, we must be prepared to do the following:

1. Stop comparing ourselves to others

One of the most detrimental things we can ever do that would jeopardize our chances for success in anything, is to compare ourselves with others. In order for us to accomplish our goals and dreams, we will need to take our eyes and focus off others, direct all our attention towards our pursuits and embrace the fact that we are all on separate journeys — leading to different destinations. We all have different strengths and limitations, gifts and talents, skills and abilities that enable us to do what we were born and have been called to do in life.

Don’t waste time comparing yourself with others, being envious of or attempting to keep up with those around you that are living the life you aspire to live someday as you don’t know what sacrifices they had to make to get to where they are or what means some of them used to attain their success. Stick to your lane and focus on the things you need to focus on to move your own life in the direction you want it to go.

2. Don’t focus on what our competition is doing

We shouldn’t waste time worrying about what our competition is doing or trying to gauge our progress against theirs’ but should instead direct our focus towards our own vision, and become our own competition by setting bigger goals and benchmarks for ourselves each time we check one off our list.

Although we live in a dog-eat-dog world where most people feel the need to protect their “turf” or believe that they have to step on others in order to get ahead, truly successful people understand that the universe is limitless and that there is enough for everyone. They also don’t concern themselves much with what their competitors are doing but instead focus on the things they can do to set themselves apart.

“Double down on what you’re good at.” – Gary Vaynerchuk

3. Be a doer, not a talker

Actions definitely speak louder than words; we need to learn how to DO more and SPEAK less. If we want people to take us and our goals and dreams seriously, we have to demonstrate through our actions what we’re all about rather than explain with mere words as talking about our aspirations benefits us in absolutely no way if we can’t translate our words into action and often results in inertia.

4. Let results speak for themselves

People recognize quality products, service or work when they encounter them or see it. If we want to be successful in our endeavors, we have to demonstrate to others what you can do for them and the kind of value we can add to their lives via the results they can expect to receive based on our services, products and work as opposed to just merely trying to convince them through our words.

5. Don’t over-share your aspirations

If there’s one thing you will most likely discover rather early on in your journey towards success is that not everyone will support you or be on board with you as far as your goals and dreams are concerned. Reasons for their lack of support might include them not understanding your vision or believing that you have what it takes to bring it to pass. You will really need to exercise your discretion to determine who to share your aspirations with and who to keep in the dark to avoid opening yourself up to other people’s negative influence and limiting beliefs.

“It has long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. they went out and happened to things.” – Leonardo Da Vinci

6. Pay attention to what and who you listen to

The things and people we listen to on a regular basis directly and indirectly influence how we perceive ourselves as well as some of our choices and actions. We need to pay particular attention to our inner dialogue. The things we say about ourselves and how we talk to ourselves as it greatly impacts how we view ourselves and in turn influences our ability or disability to make things happen.

We also need to be careful who we allow into our lives and should choose to only surround ourselves with people who speak positively about us, celebrate us and empower us with their words and support because we often become like those with whom we closely associate, open ourselves up to their influence and at times, unknowingly begin to view ourselves through their eyes.

7. Don’t indulge naysayers, critics or detractors

You better believe you will encounter plenty of them when you attempt to do something significant with your life. In fact, you should be worried if you don’t as that most likely means that you aren’t making as big of an impact as you would like.

Plug your ears and refuse to give audience to people that try to undermine you and your abilities, discredit you or dissuade you from following your goals and dreams because of their own limiting beliefs or past failures.

The journey towards making things happen can at times be lonely. Don’t allow anyone or anything to distract you and cause you give up on your goals and dreams. Keep your eyes closed, your lips zipped and ears plugged as you focus on making your way to the finish line.

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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https://addicted2success.com/life/7-things-you-must-do-if-you-want-to-accomplish-anything-in-life/

Fear: It’s What’s Holding Entrepreneurs Back

In one way or another, fear affects everyone’s decision-making from time to time. If you’re a full-time entrepreneur, then you probably felt some fear when you decided to quit your job and commit yourself to making your new business a success. The thing is, fear doesn’t go away when you make the leap.

In fact, entrepreneurs are continually facing challenges that can inspire fear and dampen their ability to grow their businesses—if they let that fear rule. If you’ve been thinking about starting a business but were too afraid, or if you have a business and you’re letting fear get in the way, here’s what you need to know about the impact of fear on your success and happiness.  

What Do We Fear?

You might not be aware of your fear. A lot of it might be more subconscious than conscious. Most of us fear similar things, and unless we desensitize ourselves to certain fears, we feel uncomfortable and try to avoid the stimulus that causes us to feel afraid.

Here are some of the common fears entrepreneurs face on a daily basis:

• Fear of failure/inadequacy
• Fear of change/the unknown
• Fear of loss
• Fear of embarrassment
• Fear of rejection

Just about every entrepreneur at some point is afraid of their business failing, or of embarrassing themselves in front of potential investors, or of making changes to normal patterns. Entrepreneurs who manage to push past these fears and act anyway are those who succeed.

How Does Fear Work?

Fear is a physical reaction to potential threats. While it’s rare to come face-to-face with primal threats like an angry bear anymore, our bodies still respond to threats of all types by flooding the body with hormones like cortisol, epinephrine, serotonin, testosterone, and estrogen. This is designed to give us more strength and awareness.

It is, essentially, survival mode. That “fight or flight” response is very helpful during moments of actual danger, but can be actively detrimental when building a business. Pushing past this embedded physical response is something entrepreneurs need to learn—they need to learn to make logical decisions when confronted with illogical feelings.

“I think fearless is having fears but jumping anyway.” – Taylor Swift

Overcoming Fear of Failure in Entrepreneurship

For most entrepreneurs (or would-be entrepreneurs), fear of failure is the biggest obstacle to success. Just ask the 57% of Fortune 500 companies that first emerged during downturns in the market. Fear of the bear market didn’t hold them back—it helped their founders catapult to success.

That said, fear can keep you from getting started at all for fear you’ll fail. It feeds into procrastination, and the tendency to make safe choices that don’t advance the business, or worse, making no choices at all.

Overcoming the fear of failure means actually taking the scary step of embracing it. Of realizing that failure is an important part of growth. You need to be able to explore different options in order to find out which ones work best—and you have to forgive yourself for failures along the way. Successful entrepreneurs don’t look at failures as a waste of time or a signal that they aren’t good enough—they learn from those failures and use them as motivation to succeed. This isn’t an easy mindset to cultivate, but it can ultimately be life-changing.

Using Fear as a Tool

Is fear holding you back? You can change that reality. Fear can be damaging if it’s allowed to make your decisions for you. Fortunately, it can also be used as a tool to enhance your decisions if you harness it properly. Think about it. Fear is a powerful force. We need it to make common sense decisions, and to avoid danger—we needed it to stay alive for much of history. The decisions we make in modern times are rarely life-or-death situations, but the brain often treats them as such.

One way you can turn fear into a productive tool is to use it as a signal. When you feel fear and hesitate to move forward, take a moment to consider what’s going on. Is your fear simply trying to avoid change and new situations? Using fear as a signal, you’re doing something you SHOULD be doing instead of a signal to turn back can help desensitize you to fear and push you beyond your normal boundaries.

That doesn’t mean you should jump into any situation headfirst without considering the potential risks and rewards, but it can help you turn the dialogue of fear around and help you make empowering decisions.

“Just remember, you can do anything you set your mind to, but it takes action, perseverance, and facing your fears.” – Gillian Anderson

How do you control your fears while moving ahead in life? Let us know in the comments below!

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https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/fear-its-whats-holding-entrepreneurs-back/

Unusual Advice To Any Young Person Wanting To Live An Extraordinary Life.

When I dropped out of high school and took a year off to work on a business full- time, I thought I knew where I was heading. Boy was I wrong!

What saved me was good people who saw something in me that I couldn’t see (my potential). Not long after high school, I was knee deep in lots of business ventures and I had a very successful DJ career.

My early 20’s were well lived and I definitely fit the cookie cutter version of success that you see on all of those entrepreneur blogs where the dude gets out of a Bentley with a tanned colored briefcase and the latest Versace boat shoes.

So, I figured based on my younger years that I’m qualified to talk about how you reach an extraordinary life.

Going through my early 20’s, these are a few things that I wish I known that lead to an extraordinary life:

 

Whatever you are doing in your 20’s will change.

My early 20’s are 360 degrees different from where I am now. I was a drunk, a brat, incredibly negative and selfish. We all start somewhere.

Wherever you are right now will be completely different in ten years so quit worrying so much.

 

You’ve got time.

You don’t need to be a millionaire by the time you’re 30. This is shitty advice and not practical. What you need to do is experience life and find out who you want to be.

Being too impatient will stop you from enjoying just how good the now is when your body is young, you don’t have wrinkles, your hair is all there and not grey, you can remember loads of information and you have energy.

 

Life will become more than just looking after yourself.

Your 20’s start out being all about you. As you move through life, it becomes more about what you can do for others. The quicker you get to this way of living, the faster you’ll reach the nirvana of an extraordinary life.

“Extraordinary life = being associated with something that’s bigger than you and focusing on the needs of others which will ultimately lead to fulfillment”

 

Show you’re hungry.

Tell the recruiter you’ll walk through walls to get the CEO position. When a mentor asks for a favor which could be your big break, grab the opportunity by the balls and be confident with your ability. Show gratitude and back yourself.

Indecision and lack of confidence is everywhere in society and so if you can give people the feeling that you’ve got your stuff together and you’ll be able to execute, you’ll win most of the time. Sometimes you’ll lose too so don’t fall in the habit of complaining either. Losing is normal.

 

Experiment on the side.

Your 20’s are about trying things to see what you like and what you hate. Maybe you love working for a big corporate and you have it within you to be CEO. Maybe you can’t stand working for someone else and you’ll end up as an entrepreneur.

All of these outcomes stem from experimenting lots. You won’t know until you try something and analyze how it makes you feel. If it feels good and is congruent with who you are, then go all in. If you lose everything, well hey, you’re still young so it’s no big deal.

I tried something I thought I hated – blogging – and now I love it. Experiment like mad.

 

Your concept of success will fall off a cliff.

Everyone, when they are young, falls for the idea of success that is money, fame and a good career. This whole philosophy will fall off a cliff when you reach your 30’s. Once you’ve had a small taste of all of this, you’ll see how meaningless it is.

The feelings that come from money, fame and a career that’s all about you will die off quicker than my indoor plants do (I must be doing something wrong!).

 

The majority of what you see on the Internet does not reflect reality.

The Internet is not fact. The Internet is not reality.

As soon as you come to terms with this somewhat unconventional idea, the sooner you’ll quit thinking everyone is living the good life and you’re not, so you need to work harder – this is not true.

Reality is what you experience day-to-day when you’re not looking at that stupid phone you carry in your pocket. Reality is what you make of it and you are in the driver’s seat.

 

Disconnect from the liars, fakers, imitators, has been’s etc.

No matter how much you try, if you spend time with these people, then a little bit of them will rub off on you. Reputation takes years to create and only minutes to destroy. Lying, faking, imitating and focusing on the past will not allow you to take any shortcuts.

There are no shortcuts.

“Honesty, integrity and working away at your dream is how you become extraordinary”

 

Most of the “piss up’s” can be skipped.

Try going to an event that has alcohol available and drink water for the night. Then you’ll see the truth of what’s really going on. People drink to forget, mostly. You don’t need to forget when you’re living a life of purpose. Sure, socialize here and there, but there’s no need to overdo it.

 

Be smart with your money.

Put some money away into a savings account or index fund. Money will give you freedom later on. Waking up with no money in the bank one day, will give you zero options. There’s going to be a time where you are between careers and you’ll need money to make that smooth transition.

“Money can buy you back time which is the only thing you’ll want more of as you get older”

 

Your parent’s rules are probably out of date.

Our parents were brought up in an era where it was all about university and owning a home with a white picket fence. In the age of technological disruption, online free speech, unlimited information on the Internet, dating apps and alternative investments, your parent’s advice probably won’t help you.

Your parents are basing their view of the world on when they were young. Living life using the rules of the 60’s and 70’s will make you fail in the age we live in today. Take your parents advice in small doses.

 

Questions and books form the basis of everything.

That’s why asking questions has become such a big deal. Every self-help book is preaching questions because they work. Questions lead to new discoveries and huge opportunities. The order in which you ask questions and how specific you are will lead to different paths – a bit like a choose your own adventure book.

You’ll also need to read. Reading about extraordinary things will give you the spark of creativity to do the same one day. You have to understand the ingredients of an extraordinary achievement before you can do the same.

 

Big pivots in life are the cornerstone of something great.

Stuff ups in your 20’s will drive you nuts. You’ll wish they didn’t happen.

As you move through your life, you’ll wish for more stuff ups which is counter-intuitive. This wish usually comes about with the realization that everything good that happens starts from something that probably sucks.

Not getting what you want forces you to go harder at getting what you want. You’ll probably get stuck later in life following the same routine every day. I’ve found that when I break the pattern, I get different results which are far better than what I was getting previously.

 

Chill the F out.

There’s no need to stress. You’re still young and you have so much to learn. Relax once in a while and stop trying to control every bit of your future. Take a chill pill and reframe from being so serious. Living an extraordinary life takes years, so sit back and enjoy the ride.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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https://addicted2success.com/life/unusual-advice-to-any-young-person-wanting-to-live-an-extraordinary-life/

7 Signs It’s Time To Break Up With Your Mentor

There are many reasons why you might want to ditch your mentor. Maybe the relationship ran its course, maybe the mentor wasn’t a good fit, perhaps the relationship has been outgrown. Your needs may have shifted since the relationship was established or maybe your mentor was an emotional vampire who literally sucked the life out of you.

Relationships can be hard and break ups can suck. Same applies to mentorship. As there is a beginning to the relationship, there is an end. While in a professional mentoring capacity there is a process that both parties follow in bringing closure to ensure a finality to the relationship.

What tends to happen in the less formal mentoring relationships is that some tend to avoid any conversation as they may be uncomfortable with saying goodbye whilst others drift over time without any real explanation as to why. Unresolved closure can stain the fabric of the relationship unnecessarily.

When the relationship has gone off course and needs are not being met, it’s time to consider ending the relationship with class and grace.

Here are 7 signs that it’s time to break up with your mentor:

1. You’re no longer learning

When the gut feeling kicks in, the uneasiness is starting to filter, it’s time to put on the self-reflective hat. Ask yourself what value you have gained from your mentor and what you feel that you are not getting to be able to move forward. Delve deeper and take an internal exploration to identify what’s missing and if there is a possibility to reshape the relationship.

When you are clear on what you want it to look like, then it will position you to decide as to whether your mentor has the mindset, heartset and skill set to facilitate the growth experience. When you hit the pause button you begin to unveil your needs and the future pathway. If you are no longer learning or chemistry is not there, don’t prolong the inevitable. Staying in the relationship is a disservice to both parties. It’s time to move on.

“The best way a mentor can prepare another leader is to expose him or her to other great people.” – John C. Maxwell

2. You’re no longer doing what’s required

Every so often one or the other party fails to show up or completely abandons the relationship. When a mentor is assigned or imposed, mentees fail to take it seriously and often leave or do the required minimum with no desire to continue. Phase things out gradually and don’t burn the boats by abandoning the relationship. You may need them in the future to take you to dry land.

3. You have unproductive meetings

A series of unproductive meetings may be a signal that a mentoring relationship has run its course. You shouldn’t be afraid to explicitly dial down the frequency of meetings or stop them entirely. End the relationship by simply letting them know that you have grown through the experience, provide specific examples and you will be in contact with them if a specific issue arises in the future.

4. Too many cancellations or reschedules

Too many cancellations or reschedules should ring alarms bells. As a good beginning is important, so is a good ending. Be prepared to end those relationships that are unproductive and lack commitment. Invest in the ones that will take you to the next level.

Be as truthful as why the relationship is ending and tie up loose ends. No need for anyone or any details to be left hanging. Honor the relationship for the growth opportunity and remain respectful beyond the conversation. You never know when paths will cross.

“A mentor is someone who sees more talent and ability within you, than you see in yourself, and helps bring it out of you.” – Bob Proctor

5. They keep giving you the same advice over and over again

Most mentor relationships begin with the purest of intentions. Mentors provide guidance based on their experience and sage advice. The mentee role is critical in listening to the content that is being provided and how this advice is crafted to suit a situation. The literal application rarely works as the parameters in its application would be different.

It is necessary to craft individual solutions to challenges. If your mentor offers the same advice to you in multiple situations or insists that the way they proceeded was the only pathway to consider, then warning bells should start to ring.

6. Your mentor isn’t letting you fail

Mentors can provide sound advice, guidance and direction when needed to transcend limitations, finding solutions or trying to keep your head above water in a sinking ship. Even though the mentor can play the savior role, it’s not helpful or healthy.

If you invest too much time relying on the advice of others to solve problems, you run the risk of never failing and experiencing one of the most valuable ways to become a better professional human being. Learning experiences are not always positive yet lead to contemplation and new possibilities.

Always doing the right thing breeds complacency and stagnant thinking. The growth is in the learning and failure is just feedback.  The ones who truly succeed are not afraid of taking risks and expanding their unfamiliar zones.

7. Mentor is experiencing separation anxiety

As most parents experience their children leaving home, same principle applies to the mentee wanting to distance themselves from mentors. Mentors who are not ready for the separation can feel abandoned, angry or resentful and even impede the mentee’s opportunities for progression stalled.

When breaking up the relationship, delicate and respectful handling is required. Do not attempt to give feedback while emotions are running high. Invest in maintaining a good rapport within the professional network around the mentor.

What is your experience with breaking up with your mentor? Comment below!

from
https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/7-signs-its-time-to-break-up-with-your-mentor/